I was having a really busy schedule for more than a few months now. My body was growing weaker by every passing day. It was an evening I came back home and went for an evening shower all of a sudden each and every muscle of my body slacked. I fell down on the marble floor. Icy floor was burning my skin but all efforts to retaliate this cold pain went in vain. My eye brows were flapping wildly. Being unable to move a muscle I lay there on the steel cold floor watching still frames after still frames with my struggling eyes. Everything was getting blurred with every passing moment. Soon they were closed and it was all dark.
After a while the darkness began to fade and misty white fog began replacing it bit by bit. My entire life was flashing back in front of my eyes it felt like I was reliving every moment but I couldn't change any of it, watching it all happening in front of me, I was standing there helpless. This is when you realize the Power of death and how helpless we are when compared to it. It was like an aeon hanging between Life and death, heaven and hell, good and evil. And as I was helpless watching every moment of my life played again in front of my eyes. That's when I realized how much wrong I have done in my life. What fake saintly impression I had about myself just because I didn’t drink, smoke or do adultery.
The mother who cared for me more than anything else who looked after me without ever asking for anything, who was there for me on every single step that I take. But being a heedless son I never even bothered to express my gratitude and love to her instead when ever there was more salt in food or no sugar in milk I teased her as if she had committed a blunder. The dad who took pains to raise me up inch by inch, the one who worked hard every single moment to give me as lavish upbringing as he could? I cursed him for never looking after me for never having time for me. The Brother, who kept all my untold secrets and always stood by me whenever I needed him, I never let go, any opportunity to humiliate him.
The mist began to grow denser and denser now. It was getting darker and suffocating I could sense my self loosing the last of the strings. Just one last chance. To make it all right. It’s rightly said " When things are in abundance we don’t value them its when they rare that we realize their true value and meaning”. I know I am dying and can’t repay all wrong that I have done. But those of you who are still living why are you killing every moment??
My senses must be playing games with me. But the dark mist was shaken by these vibrations.
“Josh! Wake up Son! For God's sake wake up"
Where am I? In Hell??Or I have got another chance a second chance??
No, it can't be hell! My mom would definitely not be there.
That’s when I saw my mom's face tears were rolling down from her eyes. Earlier they were tears of grief and now tears of relief. My dad and brother stood there staring at me flabbergasted by the eventual happenings.
Just than, after ages I burst out into tears. I hugged my mom as if it was the last time that I might be able to do it and we both cried. I don’t remember how long I cried.
But being a Lucky Idiot That I am.
I have got another chance.
Thank You God.
20 Jan 2010